Affairs To Remember - Notes From A Planner

Things To Consider When Taking On A DIY Project

2011-10-13T15:49:00.007-04:00

So, you think you want to do it yourself when it comes to some or all aspects of planning your wedding. Well, before taking on a do-it-yourself project, I encourage you to think about what that means, and to answer these questions before diving in.

1. What Is The Purpose/Motivation/Reason for Taking on This Project?
· Are you doing it to save money?
· Are you doing it to express your creative side?
· Are you doing it to have hands on experience in planning your wedding?

2. Will It Really Save You Money?
· Do you have to take a class to learn how to do the project?
· Have you factored in the cost of materials, books, and the need for extra supplies to account for the mistakes you will undoubtedly make?
· Have you factored in the time it will take to drive around to get the material, etc.?

3. Will You Have The Time To Work on the Project?
· You’re working, planning a wedding, taking care of family, not to mention yourself. Will you have the time to take on this project?
· Taking on an extra task/project when your plate is already full is a sure recipe for stress, burnout and a meltdown

4. DIY Doesn’t Mean Doing it ALL By Yourself
· What this means very simply is it's okay to allow others to help you

Moral of the story: You are the bride not superwoman. Don’t let the fact that you think it would be nice to get the credit for pulling together such a fabulous event or project keep you from hiring professionals to do the job or at the very least, ask for help from loved ones and friends.

The Ties That Bind

2011-09-17T10:57:00.001-04:00

In a previous post I shared a few tips on documenting the details of your big day, and making sure your wants and wishes are clearly detailed in your wedding professionals contracts. Following are a few more tips to help you navigate the ties that bind.

· Get everything in writing because verbal deals are not binding.

· Negotiating is like a dance. It's give and take. Everything is negotiable! Howevever my next point is crucial...

· Think it through! What are your needs, wants, and absolute must haves? The time spent before signing the contract is called negotiating. Once the contract is signed, it’s called BEGGING.

· Here today, gone tomorrow. There is a high rate of turnover in banquet sales. The sales person who promises you the world today, could very well be off to another sales position tomorrow. If your sales person leaves – all the verbal agreements go with them and you won’t get what was “promised”.

· Professional wedding planners may seem like magicians, however if what you want is not in the contract, your planner’s hands are tied. Although your planner will go to bat for you, she may not be able to “make it happen” if it’s not in writing.

· As new deals, agreements and promises are made, make sure to get a new contract or signed addendum.

· If a verbal agreement was made, be sure to follow it up with an email confirming the discussed details and request a reply confirmation.

· Make sure you get a copy of every change, note, discussion, etc.

· No detail is too small to note, especially if it is important to the success and the vision you have for your wedding day.

Contracts are the least fun part of planning a wedding, but they are absolutely the most vital part of your wedding day success!

What's In Your Emergency Kit?

2011-09-15T15:58:00.010-04:00

Despite all of the claims of producing a “perfect” wedding, the reality of the day is that there will be some snafus. Unforeseen situations will arise that you did not plan for, stuff will happen, and people will be people. How prepared are you? If you are lucky you will have a professional wedding planner on hand to run interference and you will not have to tend to the issues yourself. However, if you decide to go it alone, an emergency kit is a must. The wedding day emergency kit that I prepare for each client is filled with over a hundred items. Quite honestly unless you’ve planned hundreds of weddings, some of the things you’d find in the kit would have questioning why. As a planner it is my job to think outside of the box and to see the whole picture. So, here are just a few “out of the box” thinking items you might want to include in your kit.

Toothpicks – are perfect for stabilizing a bent boutonniere. Simply run the toothpick through the center of the flower into the stem in order to straighten it out again and keep it from drooping.

Rubber bands – waist band too tight? Rubber bands are perfect for fastening pants and covering the waist band with a vest or cummerbund.

Floral Tape – is definitely a must for missing or completely destroyed boutonnieres. Solution: remove a floral stem from an altar arrangement or one of the bridesmaids bouquets, cut the stem down to size and wrap floral tape around it…and voila you are back in business!

Panty Liners – work extremely well under the armpits of a very nervous groom :-)

Straws – reduces the need for constant lipstick touch-ups for bride and bridesmaids who need to drink water or their beverage of choice while waiting to take pictures and partake in other wedding day festivities.

Crochet Needle – an absolute MUST have for buttoning those tiny buttons on the back of the brides wedding gown!

Stain Remover – Those “Shout Wipe Pads” are the best thing created since sliced bread! Inevitably, the bride is going to get a mark or smudge or something on her gown between the time she puts it on and the time she heads to the ceremony…never fails, so stock up!

Again, these are just a few items you should consider having in your kit. It’s better to be prepared and not need them, than to need them and not be prepared.

I would love to hear from you. What potential wedding day disaster was averted because you or your coordinator was prepared with a well- stocked emergency kit?

It’s A Matter of Time – Wedding Day Itinerary Construction Tip #1

2011-08-29T15:32:00.010-04:00

When constructing your wedding day itinerary, there are three points of views to be considered. The first of which, is from the view point of you as the couple, your families and the wedding party.

The last thing you want on your wedding day is for those involved (including yourselves) to feel anxious, harried, rushed or unprepared for the wedding. If the day starts off running behind schedule it will create a snowball effect for the rest of the day, and you will find yourselves trying to play catch up as the day progresses.

One of the first things to take into account is the preparation time (hair, make-up, grooming, and dressing) needed for the bride, groom, attendants, parents, etc., and the travel time needed to get all of the players to the ceremony site on time. Keep in mind that on time doesn’t mean the start time but at least 45 minutes to an hour before. Here are a few tips to help you better manage your preparation and travel time.

Hair and Make-up

· If it is at all possible, please avoid getting your hair done on the day of the wedding. Of course every bride and for that matter bridesmaid wants to have a fresh hair style on the day of the wedding. This can be accomplished by getting your hair done the day before and getting it touched up on the morning of the wedding.
· Get all coloring, cutting, perms and weaves done a day or two before the wedding day…these processes will eat up time that you do not have on the wedding day.
· Get all facials, waxing, plucking, etc. done a week or two before your wedding. The last thing you want is to have to spend "time" tending to a swollen, pimply, red, blotchy face on your big day.
· If you will be having a make-up artist do your make-up as well as the make-up for your bridal party, plan accordingly. Generally speaking make-up artist require 30 to 45 minutes for each face, and like to have at least an hour for the bride.
· I don’t want to leave out the groom and groomsmen on this one. Similar to the advice for the bride and bridesmaids, gentlemen please get your haircut and shave a day or two before the big day. Your wedding day is the one day it will take a little longer to prepare yourself, and you don’t want to be delayed by the barber.

Travel Preparation

· When it comes to scheduling your travel itinerary, obviously you want to be on time. In order to do that, be sure to take into account such things as weather conditions, traffic patterns during your travel time, and construction that may be taking place on your travel route.
· Be sure to factor in the number of people and the time it takes for them to get in and out of the vehicle.
· If you will be using a larger vehicle, such as a stretch limo, hummer, etc., be sure to make allowance for the extra time these vehicles will need to navigate through streets that you normally drive with ease.

Organization is Key

· One of the best pieces of advice I can give on the subject of preparing yourself on the morning of the wedding is to be organized. There will be a lot going on as everyone will be trying to get themselves together, and assist the bride and groom in their preparation. A clutter free environment is the goal. If multiple people are getting dressed in one location, it is wise to get organized by hanging up attire, lining up shoes, laying out jewelry, and packing necessary items that you will need during the course of the day as you go along. Be sure to get rid of unneeded bags, boxes, etc., and designate a separate area for hair and make-up.

Be sure to check back later for tips on how to construct your wedding day itinerary from the point of view of your vendors.

The Gown Of Your Dream Can Make A Wish Come True

2011-05-31T10:21:00.003-04:00

Last Thursday I had the pleasure of combining my two loves – working with brides and volunteering for a worthy cause at the fund raising event “Brides Against Breast Cancer” – for the granting wishes organization “Making Memories”.

This annual event serves a two fold purpose. It gives blushing-brides-to-be a chance to find the dress of their dreams at an amazing savings, while making wishes and dreams come true for women and men who are losing their fight against breast cancer.

Gowns are donated by bridal shops, designers, manufactures and individuals alike. Proceeds from this sales event help to bring moments of joy into the life of someone for who a cure is too late.

Hats off to the Making Memories Foundation and others like it, and to the brides-to-be such as Danae and Parisa, who I met while volunteering, who thought it not robbery to make a piece of their day count in the life of another.

Plan Well My Friend – Plan Well

2011-03-29T09:04:00.006-04:00

I like the slogan for “Cure Auto Insurance”. It simply says…drive well. That got me to thinking about “insuring” the success of your wedding. Great weddings/events don’t just happen, they are planned, and if they are planned well, will leave you feeling all aglow for years to come and have your guests talking for months on end. With that in mind, here are a few tips to help you plan well.

Your first test in wedding planning flexibility will be in choosing a date. It would be a wonderful thing if the first date your chose was available for all involved. However, if it turns out that it is not, you then have to determine what’s more important to you: the day, the date, the availability of the venue you want, your pastor/minister’s availability, the month, the time of year, the availability of your best friend to be in the wedding, etc.

How busy will you be prior to your big day? Life will continue to happen as you plan your wedding. There will be work deadlines, vacations, holidays, doctor appointments, children and elderly parents to care for, celebrations for family and friends, etc. The list is endless. It would do you well to do some forward thinking to determine if the date you decide will conflict with other life responsibilities and happenings.

The style of wedding you want should be considered early on. Knowing your wedding style will help you to determine your date, venue and other wedding planning elements. If, for example, you want a Garden Themed wedding, you’d probably lean towards a date in April or May, and you might be attracted to an arboretum or tented outdoor shindig.

The location of your wedding is a critical element. It sets the tone. It tells the story. It serves as the backdrop for the start of your new lives together. What you need to know and understand is that venues, especially the more popular ones book years in advance. If you have fallen in love with a venue, and it is a non-negotiable for you, my recommendation is to book it early on. Keep in mind you may have to sacrifice the date you want for another that is available.

These are just a few examples of planning well, my friend.

I Had The Time Of My Life

2011-03-24T15:42:00.016-04:00

As you begin to plan the details of your wedding, keep in mind that the wedding is not just for you and your sweetie. I often say that while marriage is for the couple, the wedding is for your friends and family to enjoy. The wedding gives those you love and are close to an opportunity to share in the happiest day of your life, and to have a great time in the process. As you are pulling the details together for your big day, following are some common mistakes to avoid:

Seating Guests At A Table Where They Don’t Know Anyone
Putting together a seating arrangement is challenging. But the goal to keep in mind is for everyone to have a good time. This is not the time to play “match-maker” amongst your single friends or to create a “family affair” with yours, mine and ours meeting for the first time. Small talk makes for an awkward experience. You want each table to come alive and have their own little "private party"…trust me it makes for a wonderful time to be had by all. For more suggestions on how to put together your seating arrangements, click here.

Playing Music Too Loud
Although this is the time to get your party "on", you do not want your guests leaving the party with ringing ears and a splitting headache. This is especially a sensitive area for your older guests. If the music is too loud, it is not only uncomfortable to sit through, but also hinders conversation and can put a damper on your reception. When you meet with your DJ or Band, be sure to discuss the sound levels and make sure they do a sound check in both the front and back of the room.

Not Giving Your Guests A Chance To Congratulate You As The New Mr. And Mrs.
Guests, without a doubt want to have an opportunity to greet you as husband and wife and offer their congratulations. If you are not having a receiving line because of time constrains, space issues, etc., please be sure to make your rounds as a couple, throughout the reception to greet each guest and give them the opportunity to offer their well wishes.

These are just a few guest "pet peeves" if you will. I will share more in a future post. Happy Planning!

Smooches

2011-03-22T07:15:00.001-04:00

Planning a bridal shower or baby shower? Undecided about what to give as a favor gift? How about treating your sister friends to this adorable personalized vanilla scented lip balm? Present them as a way of saying thanks for their support during this special time in your life. Check out MomentsOfElegance.com to choose from a selection of 17 designs and 4 color options. Your friends will definitely kiss you for it :-D

Bridal Survival Tip #4 - Allow Yourself Some Flexibility

2011-03-20T12:22:00.012-04:00

It’s your wedding…I get that. You’ve always dreamed of this day…I get that. You want the wedding party to wear plaid (okay, maybe I’m pushing it), but the point I’m trying to make is that just because it’s your wedding it doesn’t give you cart blanch to be inflexible, stubborn and unrealistic about what you want. Here are a few of the disadvantages of having this type of attitude towards the planning of your wedding.

It creates undue stress & tension on an already emotional experience.

It shows insensitivity towards the feelings of others.

It takes the pleasure out of planning – for you and for those around you.

To avoid experiencing these negative feelings, my advice is to be flexible with some of your desires. I promise this will keep you from snapping under the pressure of planning.

It's A Matter of Time - Timeline Tips Series

2011-03-19T07:15:00.001-04:00

Timelines are an absolute must when it comes to planning your wedding. They provide a detailed snapshot of EVERYTHING that will take place on that day, and in some cases, detail the days leading up to the big day. A well thought out timeline will cover every detail from sunrise to sunset, from setup to breakdown and everything in between. To ensure your wedding day success, your timeline should be shared with everyone involved with executing the days events. Developing a detailed timeline is no light-weight matter. A professional planner can offer this service to you and save you countless hours of frustration and stress. For those of you who decide to go it alone, I will share with you in this series, tips on what should be included in your timeline and provide you with pertinent information that will keep you on track and on schedule on the most important day of your life. Be sure to stay tuned!

The Key To Hiring A Wedding Planner That Meets Your Needs

2011-03-17T07:15:00.002-04:00

When it comes to building your team of wedding professionals who will work together to give you a picture perfect day it is important to do your homework up front and equally important to know what you are looking for. This rule of thumb holds true for every aspect of product or service…from caterer, to photographer to wedding planner, which brings me to the reason for this post…

Not all wedding planners are created equal. As it is with other services, wedding planners also have specialties. The keys to finding one who is a perfect fit for you is to know where your areas of weakness lie, and to know what you want.

If for example you find that you lack a flair for creativity and uniqueness, then you are most likely in the market for a planner who is skilled in designing. This type of planner can create a “wow” experience for you and your guests. Preston Bailey, David Tutera and Colin Cowie fall into this category. Creating a unique and memorable experience is the aim and expertise of this type of planner.

Like many brides, you may have budget constraints or you may be short on the time that is required for planning a wedding. You would do best to look for a planner who is skilled in getting you more bang for your buck, and fitting you with vendors who match your budget, style preference and personality. This type of planner has many years of experience and a pool of quality vendor with whom she has established relationships with and has the leverage to “negotiate" the best prices and services for your money.

Now if you find yourself completely overwhelmed by the sheer volume of details involved in planning or you are disorganized and frazzled then you need a planner who is detailed oriented, and thorough in guiding you to the “what’s next” on that seemingly never ending checklist of things to do. This type of planner is skilled in logistics and can move you from point A to point B in an effortless manner.

Most professional planners are proficient in all three areas, however as it is in most things in life, they may excel in one area over another. Again, what you need to know and understand is what your specific needs are and research a planner that fits that need, and when it’s all over, you will sing the praises of her name. Happy Planning!

More Thoughts On Creating Your Own Wedding WOW

2011-03-15T07:14:00.000-04:00

In the previous post, I talked about envisioning your big day: the sights, the sounds, the experiences you want your guests to walk away with. Today, I want to talk about how incorporating a theme plays a huge role in creating your own wedding wow.

Choose an element (theme) and carry it throughout the wedding. Themes bring cohesiveness to your wedding. You want to have a rhyme and reason for the elements you include in your day. A theme can center around a color, a symbol, the story of how you met, a menu item, a season, a period in your life, etc. The ideas are endless. The point is to pick an element and build on it, and remember that less is best, subtlety is the goal. Avoid tipping the hodge podge scale, which brings me to my next tip:

Don’t try to have it all. I know, I know, it’s all so “pretty” and you think you must have it for your day. But this is where most brides make their mistake and find themselves feeling overwhelmed and scattered because they lose focus. That is why it is so important to start with a vision and to agree upon your priorities, so that as you begin to research the possibilities, you do so with your vision firmly in mind and you won’t be tempted by all of the pretty elements that will undoubtedly beckon your name.

Plan within you budget. Remember, it all adds up and it does so very quickly. Once your budget is set, commit to staying within those constraints. This will keep you from “just having to have this or having to have that”. And there you will have it…Wedding WOW…and peace of mind in the process!

Make Your Mark!

2011-03-13T07:00:00.000-04:00

Monograms are a classy and elegant way to carry out the design or theme of your wedding. The following ideas are a great way for making your mark on your day!

In addition to the ideas pictured above, here is a list of a few things on which you can "make your mark"
Stamped on your Wedding Stationary
Custom Made Postage Stamp
Envelop Seal
Custom Made Aisle Runner
Out-of-Town Welcome Bags
Guest Book
Place Cards and Menus
Cocktail Napkins
Coasters
Centerpieces
Table Numbers
Wall or Door Banner
Favor Labels

If you have a unique "make your mark" idea that you would like to share, we would love to here from you!

“Plan A” – Enjoy Each Other During The Planning Process

2011-03-10T07:14:00.002-05:00

“If I can make it here, I’ll make it anywhere…” as I began to write this post, those lyrics started playing in my head. Why you may ask? Well, if you and your sweetie can make it through the planning process without losing sight of “each other”, then I’d say you are off to the start of what will be a long and happy marriage.

If you are not careful, the next 6 months to a year (the time it takes most couples to plan their wedding) can take a toll on your relationship. Here are a few tips on how to avoid putting a strain on your relationship and how to include your sweetie in on the planning of your big day so the two of you can get a head start on living happily ever after.

He has his ideas, you have yours and never shall the two meet or agree. Not so fast ladies. Although your sweetie may not be as emotionally attached to the planning as you are, because he is thinking with a rational mind, it might do you well to listen to what he has to say. Don’t discount his input. Be flexible and remember it is his day too, and without him, there would be no wedding, so give your sweetie a little wiggle room. Contrary to popular belief, we are not the only ones with a vision for our big day. You both want to look back on the day with fond memories of the day you both planned "together".

Have a "no wedding plan" discussion. Make it a point to engage in conversation with your sweetie and talk about any and everything he wants to talk about, without bring up wedding details. I know it may not seem like it, but there are other things to talk about other than your wedding. Consider this, set one day aside each week that the two of you agree upon to sit down and discuss wedding details.

Schedule time away from work, wedding plans and the mundane day to day things. Start now to keep the fire burning in your relationship. Make plans to do things together that you both like that has absolutely nothing to do with the wedding. Enjoy your favorite hobby, exercise, spend some time enjoying each other. You might as well get a head start on your marriage…which will be the focus long after the wedding.

Creating Your Own Wedding WOW!

2011-03-07T18:55:00.005-05:00

One of the most exciting things about planning a wedding is coming up with a vision for the day. In today’s wonderful world of wedding planning there are as many ideas for doing so, as there are brides/couples. Each couple comes with their own style, experiences and story. Incorporating these elements is what creates a “Wedding WOW” experience. Consider this in creating your own.

Envision the whole picture. What is your vision for your day? With all of the wedding magazines, websites and television shows it’s easy to experience sensory overload and lose your focus. Before reaching for a bridal magazine, before surfing the web, before entertaining advice and input from well-meaning loved ones and friends, sit down with your honey and decide together what you want for your big day. What story do you want to tell? What is the experience you want your guests to walk away with? What are the sights, sounds and smells of the day? Once you have your vision firmly in place you will not fall victim to trying to have it all and driving yourself and everyone around you crazy. With a vision you can move out with confidence and a plan for your own wedding wow!

Create a wonderful experience for your guests. People are gonna talk…that’s a given. So “plan” to give them something to talk about! Sharing in your celebration, partaking in great food, experiencing good company, and having an opportunity to have a wonderful time, is the order of the day. Plan with these thoughts in mind!

The Devil Is In The Details

2010-12-07T08:42:00.000-05:00

I am convinced that Murphy's Law was born out of wedding/event planning. Of course it wasn't, but believe me, when it comes to planning an event…if it can go wrong, it will go wrong. Details, details, details is the name of the game. It is super critical to cross every "T" and dot every "I". Hiring a Professional Wedding Planner is a sure way to ensure that all of the details are covered, and covered by someone other than you. The next important step is to ensure that the details are documented in your vendor contracts. You cannot afford to leave anything to chance. The following tips will help you avoid problems on your road to Happily Ever-After.

1. To avoid surprises, misunderstandings, disappointments, and disasters, always get everything – estimates and final agreements – in writing.
2. Contracts from vendors should be detailed.
3. Cancellations and refund policies should be clear.
4. Don’t be afraid to ask questions about each contract; if you and your vendor make any changes, put those in writing too.
5. Trust your instincts; if a vendor refuses to provide a contract, seems uncooperative, or doesn’t respect your wishes, go elsewhere.
6. Confirm everything one to two weeks before the wedding.
Happy Planning!!!!!

And The Bride Wore White…

2010-12-03T20:20:00.014-05:00

…Or maybe not. How would you like to show off your flair for the dramatics on your wedding day in one of these Lia Griffith work's of art. As it states on her website, Papier-Courture.com, "Papier Courture is a collection of carefully sculpted dresses made primarily from paper. Combining artwork, photographs and text into paper prints, these innovative creations are a fusion of fashion, graphic design and fine art that exhibit Lia's passion for color and boundless imagination." Now that's one way to turn heads on your big day…Fabulous!

Bridezillas - Not A Pretty Picture

2010-07-01T16:37:00.006-04:00

I am so not a fan of the popular TV program “Bridezillas”. I think the whole idea of glorifying bad behavior is a bad idea.

From a coordinator’s standpoint, it only adds to the already intense pressure of planning a wedding, and having to do so for someone who is being difficult.

Here’s the thing, being a bride does not give license to being mean or rude. There’s nothing beautiful about that.

I am saddened by all of the professed Bridezilla’a out there. Sure, I understand you’ve been dreaming of this day for as long as you can remember. And I understand that you want what you want, but there are these things called manners, decorum and reality.

As a bride-to-be myself, I made up my mind from the onset to remain calm even in the midst of chaos. There’s always a solution, but if you are too emotional to listen to reason, you are not going to hear the logical next step.

Murphy’s Law in my opinion was born out of wedding/event planning. Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong, but that does not mean you have to be a monster to get what you want.

If you do your homework up front, and by that I mean:
1. Establish a realistic budget
2. Take time to determine what matters most to you and your sweetie
3. Hire professional vendors
4. Hire a professional Wedding Planner (MOST IMPORTANT STEP)
5. Trust those you have brought on board to make your dream come true
6. Commit yourself to enjoying the process and the journey…

…then guess what, you will have a beautiful day, and your friends and family won’t run the other way when they see you coming.

Sure this is an emotional time, but do you really want the happiest day of your life to be scarred with bad feelings and hurt family and friends lying in the wake of your temper tantrums… I think not! Let’s stop celebrating bad behavior…it’s just not cute.

My Wedding Avatar

2010-03-15T11:48:00.006-04:00

TheKnot has this cool and fun feature that allows you to create your Wedding Avatar aka "Your Inner Bride". I gave it a try and here's what I designed. Oh la la, I feel so city chic.

Come On Baby Light My Fire - Inspiration Board #6

2010-02-27T06:39:00.004-05:00

Undeniably, candles are symbolic of romance, which makes them the perfect wedding décor accessory. They can serve a number of purposes such as providing lighting and setting ambiance to a room, provide symbolic meaning during the ceremony or elegant décor at the reception. There are a variety of shapes, sizes, colors, and of course types, such as: pillar candles, votive candles, tea lights, taper candles, floating candles, and of course the unity candle. Here are just a few ideas for incorporating candles into your special day.

· To symbolize bringing the two families together most commonly used is the unity candle
· Group pillar candles of varying heights for a great centerpiece idea
· Tea Lights can be used as part of a centerpiece idea or to add soft lighting on the cake table, or guest book table or anyplace where you desire just a flicker of light
· To honor loved ones who have passed on, candles can be used as a symbolic representation of those who you wish could be with you on your special day
· Candles can add a sense of drama when used to light the pathway as you make your way down the aisle
· As a favor idea, consider scented votives combined with a CD of your favorite love songs, with a decorative tag that reads “Music to Enjoy by Candle Light”
· Lighted votive holders could serve as a place card option when decorated with parchment paper with guests name and table number wrapped around the holder – to light the way to their seats

Of course there are so many more uses for candles, but these are just a few ideas to put a little fire under you to get your juices flowing!

It's My Birthday, It's My Birthday...

2010-02-21T12:33:00.004-05:00

...I'm gonna celebrate like it's my birthday. It's a happy day, and a special day, I'm gonna party like it's my birthday...not a holiday, but a great day...so glad to be able to see another birthday!!!!

Bridal Survival Tip #3 – Count The Cost

2010-02-18T12:00:00.000-05:00

I know, I know, talking about all this money stuff is the quickest way to kill your excitement about planning your wedding, but it is absolutely the most critical first step.

It is so important for you to do your homework and research the actual costs of each component before making any plans. In Bridal Survival Tip #2 we talked about establishing priorities and determining what elements were important to both you and your honey. Now here's where the rubber meets the road – determining if your budget will support all your must have items and all the wonderful things you've seen in the magazines and on the web.

The average cost of weddings is $28,000, and it's amazing how all the little stuff adds up. To avoid frustration and disappointment it is wise to arm yourself with the actual cost of every element associated with your wedding plans. Consider how the following adds up:
• The costs per person on items such as favors, food, chair covers, cake slices etc.
• Hidden or those not so obvious costs such as alterations, cake cutting fees, corkage fees, tips
• When it comes to centerpieces and linens, think about the costs per table
• The number of people you have in your wedding party should also be taken into consideration when you have to factor in the costs of bouquets and boutonnieres, and gifts for your attendants
• Don't forget postage for both invitations and response cards (be mindful of the possibility of more postage needed for larger sized envelops)

Researching the cost will require an investment of your time, but don't let this thought overwhelm you. Hiring a Wedding Planner would be the wisest first step to take in putting together your team. Planners can get you a budget friendly pricing and save you time and energy in researching vendors because they have the information you need readily at their fingertips…they've already done the research for you!

Also, utilize this wonderful tool www.costofwedding.com to find out the national average costs of every wedding element from gowns to the cake to photography, invitations, transportation, and more.

Be sure to research packages and get detailed explanations of what is being offered and always compare apples to apples. Happy Planning!

Improve Your Relationship By 680%

2010-02-15T12:00:00.001-05:00

• Spend 10% more time together
• Generate 33% more laughter in your life together
• Focus 100% of your attention when listening to him or her
• Create a 10% increase in the amount of fun you have together
• Give up 10% of your hobby time, and give it to your partner
• Reduce your complaining by 50%
• Reduce your criticizing by 62%
• Say "I Love You" 300% more often
• Spend 10% as much time kissing as you spend watching TV every day
• Be 25% more creative in your relationship
• Be 10% more thoughtful/considerate
• If you're talkative by nature, talk 20% less, and listen 20% more
• If you're quite by nature, open up and talk 20% more

Happy Valentine's Day!

2010-02-14T00:01:00.000-05:00

Many heart felt wishes for a Happy Valentine's Day! Smooches

Please Be Seated

2010-02-13T18:52:00.007-05:00

As the bride and groom you will be the center of attention. You can opt to have the traditional head table with your wedding party seated with you, a sweethearts table, which lends itself to a more romantic setting and gives you some alone time on a day where you will undoubtedly be pulled in all directions, or you can choose to sit with your parents and close relatives. There is no right or wrong option, but simply a matter of preference. However, when it comes to seating your guests at the reception, this is often a sensitive and tedious job. Without a plan, it can be a logistical nightmare, but it doesn't have to be.

Seating arrangements are designed to encourage comfortable conversation and also to honor special guests. You want your guests to have a good time, and a well thought out seating plan will enhance your guests' enjoyment. The last thing you want to do is put your guests in the position of not knowing where to sit and having to fend for themselves for seating. Here are a few things to consider when planning your reception seating arrangements:

• Know the number of place settings per table. The last thing you want to do is complete seating assignments for tables of ten, to later find out that the tables seat eight
• As a visual aid, map out a reception floor plan so that you'll have an idea of the placement of your tables, cake, entertainment, speakers, dance floor, buffet, etc.
• Be considerate of the limitations of some guests, such as the elderly who may have trouble seeing or hearing. You want to seat them away from speakers, close to rest rooms, and in a location that they will be able to see those special moments such as the first dance
• Consider seating specific groups together, such as colleges with colleges, and teenagers with teenagers, etc.
• Make allowances for sticky family issues
• Don't try to make a love connection. Seating all of the singles together can make for an awkward situation. Consider interspersing single guests among couples who may have similar interests or common bonds
• Make sure each person knows at least 2-3 people at the table

Last piece of advice
Early in the planning process, I encourage my couples to work on their guest list, and once that is finalized, I then encourage them to work on the seating arrangements. Sure RSVP's have not come in yet, heck invitations have not even been mailed…but trust me waiting until the last minute to start your seating arrangements is a recipe for S-T-R-E-S-S.

Recipe For An A+ Relationship

2010-02-08T19:38:00.008-05:00

Recipe Overview: Recipe takes 2 individuals and turns them into 1 couple
Recipe Background: Gather ingredients over time, and practice cooking for twenty to fifty years.

Ingredients:
1 cup attraction
1 cup compatibility
2 nuts
1 quart honesty
1 pint each of faith, hope & love

Combine and mix vigorously
1 dash thoughtfulness
1 pinch ;-)
2 pints cooperation, combined with 2 pints compromise
2 quarts forgiveness
2 gallons sense of humor
Plus an endless supply of love and romance

Preparation
Combine all ingredients and stir like crazy. Leave medium lumps (if too smooth, days will be boring; but if lumps are too big, problems will be too big to swallow).

Heat with passion but never bring to a boil
Spice to your personal taste

And there you have a Recipe for and A+ Relationship!

Bon Appetite!!!!

You May Now Kiss The Bride

2010-02-06T18:49:00.005-05:00

A lot of thought and consideration goes into planning your wedding day. The food that will be served, the music that will be played, the venue for the reception, the guest list, and so on. But have you given much thought to "the kiss"? You are probably thinking, we are engaged to be married for goodness sake, we know how to kiss. Of course you do, but this will be your first kiss as husband and wife. You want it to be special for the two of you, and keep in mind that it will also leave an impression on your guests, and will forever be captured in your pictures, so you want to make it perfect, right? Well my first bit of advice is one you should like….Practice, practice, practice…you know what they say about practice. Next, classy should be the call of the day! Please no tongue action, that's just tasteless (pun intended). Of course timing is everything…too short communicates no passion, too long is just plain tacky and will make everyone uncomfortable. A 3 – 4 second kiss is just enough. Leave everything else for the honeymoon. End your kiss with a smile, and just enjoy it. It will be the last of your first kiss as husband and wife. Smooches!

What's On The Menu?

2010-02-03T20:32:00.008-05:00

When it comes to selecting those finishing touches for your wedding, menu cards are a creative way to bring your theme together. Practically speaking, they will also inform your guests of what to expect. I coordinated a wedding for a client whose reception consisted of an hors d'oeuves hour, a five course meal followed by a breakfast buffet and sweets table. Each course was better than the last, and because we used menu cards guests were aware of what to expect. They were able to pace themselves and fully enjoy all that was prepared for them (pun intended). And as an added bonus, they were able to leave with a lovely memento of the event. So, rather than leaving guests wondering, why not add this design element to your tablescape and let them know what's on the menu…Bon Appétit!

Bridal Survival Tip #2 Discuss Your Priorities

2009-12-12T16:37:00.002-05:00

Okay, so you've taken some time to enjoy your engagement and to allow it all to sink in. You've told family and friends, picked the date, purchased every wedding magazine on the stand and now you're ready to start planning the wedding! Pump the breaks…not so fast!

When it comes to planning a wedding, there are over a dozen different components that come together to make your dream day come true: flowers, cake, invitations, decorations, music, what you will wear, the venue, food, transportation, and on and on.

For both you and your fiancé the importance of any one or all of these things differ significantly. It has been my experience that women tend to be concerned about their gown, flowers and decorations, while the future hubby to be has his focus fixed on the food, the bar, and the music.

Before you meet with any vendors or share your plans with anyone, it is critical to your planning sanity to come together to discuss your priorities. This is important because:

1. Priorities provide you with a focal point, a target if you will. You and your honey should begin with the top three items on your wedding wish list. By knowing what each of you feel strongly about, you won't spend time, money and energy on the things that are not that important to you.

2. You need to have your plan in place before meeting with vendors or enlisting the help of opinionated friends and parents. Once everyone else starts to chime in with their opinions and suggestions (as well meaning as they are), it can cause angst if you are not clear about what you want.

3. As a couple you need to sit down and determine how things are going to be at "your wedding". You want the day to have meaning for both of you, not just one or the other. In the years to follow, you will both be able to look back with fond memories because the day was a reflection of you both.

4. By identifying your priorities and having a plan in place to protect your vision, you will avoid the "feeling obligated to be nice and please everyone else" trap. If after you have established your top priorities, and others have thoughts on an element that's not that important to you, then you won't mind getting a little input from your friends and not feel put upon by their suggestions.

Here's the thing, you have your vision and surprisingly he has a vision too of how the wedding should be. The tricky part is marrying the two visions so that you both can live happily ever after. The key to solving this dilemma is to establish your priorities before you get started on the planning.

Short And Sassy And Oh So Classy!

2009-12-02T19:18:00.005-05:00

Traditionally, when you think of a wedding dress, long and flowing comes to mind. But today there are just as many style options as there are brides to wear them. One such option is a short wedding dress. Not only are they elegant, soft and romantic, they are simple and practical. Short dresses, worn for the ceremony, make a great transition into the reception, where they allow freedom and ease to dance in. They are perfect for showing off long legs and sexy shoes. This pretty and feminine style option is a no brainer for a beach or outdoor wedding, and is ideal for a summer wedding. Here are just a few styles that I think are stunning, sophisticated, stylish, and sleek.

Bridal Survival Tip #1 - Don't Rush Right Into Planning The Wedding

2009-11-22T00:35:00.014-05:00

The holiday season is upon us, which also means engagement season is here as well. Now through February is prime time for proposals and engagements. Not only is this a time for spending with family and friends celebrating Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year, and let's not forget Valentines Day, it's also the time when the love of your life has decided to make this the best holiday ever by popping the question…"Will You Marry Me".

So in preparation for all the new bubbling and blushing brides to come I would like to dedicate this series to you…Bridal Survival – Tips To Help You Have A Perfect Wedding

Survival Tip #1 - Do Not Rush Right Into Planning the Wedding

Allow yourself time to enjoy being engaged without the pressure of jumping right into the planning. There will be plenty of time for planning, but for now just bask in the glow that he loves you enough to want to spend the rest of his life with you and has now made it official.

Use this time to get reacquainted with your fiancé as you work together on cultivating your relationship and making plans for your future. Make it all about your relationship and not about the wedding.

Allow some down time for your fiancé. Believe me he has worked hard on selecting a ring, planning the proposal, getting up the nerve to ask you to marry him and keeping his plans to do so from your ever suspecting eyes and ears.

Take this time to really think about your wedding day and how you would like to remember it. What do you want this day to mean to you and your honey in the years to follow? Who do you really want there to share in the day? Really put some thought into it before you start making plans.

Make the decision now, during this quiet time to enjoy the process. There will be thousands of decisions to make, and everyone will have an opinion on what you should be doing for "your big day". Resolve now to follow your heart and to do what's best for you and your honey.

Maintain your focus, which should be "I'm marrying my best friend and we are going to have a wonderful life together" rather than "I'm going to be a bride and finally have my dream wedding". Remember to keep the proper perspective.

Now I know you're excited, and you've been waiting for this all your life…but a word of caution….take this time to enjoy the engagement and to let it all sink in. Don't turn into Polly Planner mode and scare your poor fiancé away.

What's In A Name?

2009-11-13T00:00:00.011-05:00

I must admit, up until last year, my thoughts and feelings about changing my last name if I were ever to get married caused me much angst. I mean, this is my name. I've had it all my life. It's a part of who I am, and besides it's a pretty cool name…Stacey Strickler….has a nice ring to it…don't you think? Of course I considered hyphenating, but after talking to a friend she helped me to understand that when you say "I do", the two become one and you agree to take it all (including the name). I've embraced it and am looking forward to becoming a Mrs. and taking his last name as my own.

Following is a name change checklist that will help you (and me) in making the transition from Miss to Mrs.

Social Security
Drivers License
Passport
Voter Registration
Auto Registration
401K accounts
Car insurance/registration
Billing accounts (credit cards, cell phone, electric, water, gas)
Club memberships
Dentist's and Doctor's office
Employment records
Email addresses
Homeowners's/renter's insurance
IRA accounts
Leases
Life insurance
Loans
Medical insurance
Other insurance
Pension plan records
Post office
Property titles
Safe-deposit box
School records
Social security
Stocks and bonds
Subscriptions
Wills/trusts

Congratulations To The Murray's

2009-10-18T19:20:00.022-04:00

I love my job…and here's why...just look at this beautiful couple! Congratulations to Ronnie and Rinaldo, the new Mr. and Mrs. Murray. I had the pleasure of working with this wonderful couple for a year leading up to their October, 10, 2009 Wedding.

The inspiration for this wedding was apples…oh how sweet it is…and the theme was carried throughout from the first impression of the invitations to the placecards, which were real apples.

The cake was beautifully designed to incorporate the apple theme, and each table was "tastefully" decorated with a single red rose inside an elegant bud vase surrounded by four votive candle holders with tealights, and red and green wax apples sprinkled on top of a mirror to add color, apple scent, and a little "spice".

And lastly to add a touch of "flavor", the couple sent their guests off with yummy candy from their Candy Buffet display.

In a word from their planner...this wedding was simply scrumptous! Ronnie and Rinaldo, I wish you all the best, and many years of Sweet Love!

"The Conscious Bride", A Must Read For Every Newly Engaged Bride-To-Be

2009-08-24T22:01:00.007-04:00

One of the most exciting times in a woman's life is when she becomes engaged. Once the news of the engagement reaches family and friends, she is thrust into a series of parties and the world-wind experience of planning a wedding.

This journey, albeit exciting, does not come without its frustrations. Because so much emphasis is placed on planning for the wedding day, many brides (including myself) find themselves experiencing conflicting emotions.

This time of emotional transition is something nobody seems to talk about. The one thing on everyone's mind is planning the perfect wedding, but these emotions, which include anxieties about separating from girlfriends, separating from mom, and the loss of identity as a single woman, just to name a few, are real and need to be talked about and addressed before the bride takes her sacred journey.

This book recognizes that as one phase of life is ending, and a new phase is beginning, it is imperative that a bride take notice of what's going on inside of her, emotionally, and take the time to really understand and address why she's on cloud nine one moment and stricken with fear the next.

I have to tell you that after reading the book, I realized that I was not crazy. As excited as I am about becoming a "Mrs.", my excitement does not come without my own fears and anxieties as I move into this next phase of my life. I've gone through the gamut of emotions, from stressing about who will take care of my mom, to will I be a good wife or ruin this man's life. The emotions are scary, and I'm glad there is a book that walks you through the process of not just planning for the wedding, but helping you to understand that what you are feeling is normal, as it helps to prepare you, and take you through the process so that you will not only have a serene and joyful wedding day, but a healthy and thriving marriage - all without losing your mind!

These Take The Cake!

2009-07-31T21:39:00.010-04:00

If you're looking for something different to do at your wedding reception that's not totally over the top, why not consider cupcakes in place of a traditional wedding cake?
Of course this idea is nothing new. Cupcakes have been the trend over the past few years, and I think it's a trend that's here to stay.

Keep in mind that they are not for every bride, but they are a fun way to add personality to your day.

They are an unexpected detail, which offers a wonderful surprise for your guests, especially the more traditional ones.

Because of their versatility, a variety of flavors can be offered.

Not only are they fun and unexpected, but they are also economical, especially if you prepare them yourself, however I do caution against this for the bride…unless you have a lot of help!

They make for a great photo opportunity, as they are a wonderful way to enhance your décor.

As you can see they serve a multi-purpose…fun, décor enhancement, economical, and let's not forget to add that they are certainly a favor option, one that is sure to be used…or shall I say eaten!

So why not let these delicious treats, serve you and your guests well, and take you back to your childhood?

They Do...Again and Again

2009-07-09T22:07:00.004-04:00

We could all take a page from this celebrity couple's book of romance. Heidi Klum and Seal were married four years ago in 2005. They celebrate their anniversary every year by recommitting to each other in a renewal ceremony.

How's that for keeping the romance and love alive in your relationship? I think it is a wonderful idea for couples to adopt as their own, if not every year perhaps every few years or at least milestone years within the relationship.

Seal has been reported as saying "We love it. It's great saying your vows again. You remember who it was you fell in love with. It's also a good excuse to have a big party, and we have a different theme every year."

Amongst other ideas, they have planned an Indian themed party for a small group of friends and relatives to celebrate with them. Not only is this an expression of their love and commitment to each other, it's also a great way to keep the creativity flowing in their relationship and keep things fresh. Gotta love this!

Let Them Eat Cake!

2009-06-18T09:14:00.016-04:00

There are so many design elements to consider in planning your wedding. The design of your cake is at the top of the list next to selecting your wedding gown. Gone are the days of the traditional white wedding cake. What makes your cake distinctive and unique are the elements you choose to use in designing it. With this in mind, there are some things to consider when putting the icing on the cake!
Consider The Cost
No more than 5% of your wedding budget should be devoted to your cake. Generally speaking cake cost run anywhere from $400 to $8,000. The cost is usually based on a per slice/per serving basis. You could pay anywhere from $4.00 to $25 per slice. Also keep in mind the more elaborate the decorations, the more complex the assembly, and the more pure the ingredients, the more you will pay.

above image photo credit http://www.maisiefantaisie.co.uk/

Style Preference
Some popular trends include:
Cupcakes
Smaller wedding cakes on each table to serve 8-10 guests at the table
Cake designed to match your dress
Colors to match wedding palette
Thematic cakes decorated to coincide with your theme (ex. shell adorned cake for a beach themed wedding)

above image photo credit http://www.maisiefantaisie.co.uk/

Size Does Matter
When it comes to the size of the cake, a general rule of thumb to keep in mind is that a three tier cake normally serves 50 to 100 guests. As your guest count goes up, additional tiers will need to be added. Also consider the reception space. If the reception is being held in a grandiose room with high ceilings, a taller cake with extra tiers will better suit the space, and like wise a smaller lesser tiered cake would better suit a room with lower ceilings.

above image photo credit http://www.maisiefantaisie.co.uk/

It's A Matter of Taste
Chocolate, strawberry, raspberry, carrot cake, lemon…ummm it all sounds so good, and the choices are endless. One thing to keep in mind…if you decide you would like a flavor that is out of the ordinary be sure to find a baker that specializes in that particular flavor.

above image photo credit http://www.maisiefantaisie.co.uk/

Let Them Have Cake and Be Able To Eat It Too
You want to be able to enjoy your own cake. Therefore be conscious of the ingredients which go into making it. If either of you are allergic to key ingredients such as soy, peanuts, etc., be sure to mention this to your baker. Also if your family has certain cultural restrictions, you will need to research bakers who can fulfill your special requests.

Why Does The Groom Make His Entrance First?

2009-06-08T05:59:00.001-04:00

As a guest to quite a few weddings, and a wedding coordinator of hundreds over the years, one of the highlights of the ceremony for me is seeing the expression of the groom's face as the bride make her grand entrance. Some grooms grin from ear to ear, some tear up, others break down into a gut wrenching sob, but whatever the expression of emotion displayed, it is always priceless. Traditionally, the groom enters the sanctuary first. Have you ever wondered why? You might think it is designed that way for him to stand at the altar with pride and joy to see his beautiful bride ascend down the aisle. However, by entering first, the groom signifies that he is the covenant initiator. The reason this is important is because whoever initiates the covenant assumes greater responsibility for seeing it fulfilled. God initiated covenants with Noah, Abraham and David. Christ initiated the covenant of salvation with us, and He is still at work to fulfill His covenant, in that when the trumpets sound, and Christ appears, He is coming to consummate the wedding with His bride, the Church.

The Place Where You Stand Is Holy Ground

2009-06-03T23:29:00.000-04:00

Often time couples put more thought and effort into planning the "Wedding Reception". The marriage ceremony however is the most important part of your wedding day, and not something to be taken lightly. It is a form of worship. Consider the aisle runner for example. When the bride makes her entrance she takes her walk down the aisle, which is prepared for her using a white aisle runner. But have you ever wondered why this is done? Well, the significance of the white aisle runner is that it is a symbol of walking on holy ground. The marriage covenant is not just made between the bride and groom before the assembly of their witnesses. It is made in the presence of God, who is actively involved in the covenant since it is God who joins them together (Matthew 19:6 NIV So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate). In Exodus 3:5, when Moses entered into the presence of God, he was told to respect His presence with the command "Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground". As you are making plans, think about the meaning and reasons behind the traditions, which have become a part of the wedding day. Understanding the origin will undoubtedly add a greater level of significance to all the details which go into planning wedding.

Let's Get This Party Started!

2009-04-15T22:27:00.004-04:00

I believe your wedding planner and your DJ and/or band are the two key players to ensuring a fabulous event. Your wedding reception is the biggest party you'll ever throw. It's a time of celebration! Your wedding planner's role is to pull all of the elements together to work on your behalf to perform like a well oiled machine. Your DJ or band, will get and hopefully keep the celebration going. Therefore the person(s) you select to do this will make all the difference in how your party of a lifetime unfolds. Knowing how to get your people up on the dance floor is a must. You don't want to worry about getting your reluctant guests up on the dance floor on your wedding day. Your DJ or band leader must know how to interact with the crowd and get them involved. Certainly knowing what to play is important, but also knowing when to play it is key to a successful party. Timing is a must! The point here is understanding that there is more involved in choosing a DJ or band and trusting that they'll play all your favorite tunes from your playlist. They should how to read your crowd and know when to pump up the volume.

How Sweet It Is

2009-04-09T23:07:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday To Me!

2009-02-21T00:04:00.001-05:00

I'm 21...again. I must confess, it feels better the second time around :-)

Style, Grace, Class...Defined!

2009-01-30T00:25:00.005-05:00

It’s no secret that I love Oprah Winfrey, but I must admit that Michelle Obama has pushed Oprah into second place as my new obsession. Michelle is the epidemy of style, grace and class. She ooses sophistication and commands respect. I love that even though she is just as intelligent, charismatic, and powerful in her own right, she steps back and let’s her husband shine. As Oprah would say….Love That! So today I’d like to honor my new BFF Michelle Obama…America’s new First Lady and the love of our President’s life.

I'm Feeling The Love

2009-01-28T16:15:00.033-05:00

I feel honored. My collegue at For Your Event Planning, recently awarded me with some blog luv! Its a wonderful thing to be recognized by your readers and peers. I'd like to spread the love by nominating the following bloggers and letting them know I appreciate their work. Thank you all for keeping me inspired!

Honorees please follow these instructions and share the LUV!

1. Put the logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate at least 10 blogs which show GREAT ATTITUDE and/or GRATITUDE
3. Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.
4. Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog.
5. Share the love and link to this post and to the person from whom you received the award.

Randi @Always Fabulous Events
Deidre @Always A Positive Image
Erika @E-vents
LaKendra @Affairs With Elegance
Katasha @K Sherrie + Company
Isis @Posh Events LLC
Tish @Pink Tea Rose Events
Tere @At Your Wish EPDS
Pershama @A Dailey Event
Gabrielle @Faire La Fete

Breakfast At Tiffany's Anyone? - Inspiration Board #5

2009-01-21T22:22:00.002-05:00

Hail To The Cheif!

2009-01-20T15:57:00.003-05:00

We love you Mr. President, and we are praying for you and your family. You make us proud.

Sneak Preview "Unique Wedding Invitation"

2008-12-15T21:15:00.008-05:00

Check out this great idea I found over on J.Bailey Occasions. I fell in love with this cool Save the Date card, which is designed to look like a movie premier poster, featuring guess who? That's right, you the happy couple. Trust me your guests will not toss this aside or forget where they put it. It's absolutley a wonderful concept, especially for couples who are movie buffs.

The Rules of Engagement - (Engaging a Wedding Planner, That Is)

2008-12-08T16:09:00.014-05:00

As a Wedding Planner it is my job to see to it that you have a flawless wedding. But let's face it, there is no such thing as flawless, at least not in the world of wedding planning. The harsh but true reality is that some things will not go according to plan. However, as a professional planner (and I stress professional), my job is to operate under the assumption that the best plan is plan B and in some cases, C, D and F, so that no one will ever be the wiser that catastrophe prevention is taking place behind the scenes. Therefore it seems to me that when thinking about hiring a wedding planner, the question should not be if you should hire one, but rather what you should be considering in the planner you do choose to hire.

Rule #1 Be Sure To Hire A Planner Whose Personality Compliments Your Own
Simply put, you should like your planner. Generally speaking, your planner will spend hours with you as you go through the planning process together. You want to make sure this time is spent with someone you get along with, someone who understands your vision for your day, and someone you trust, which brings me to rule #2

Rule #2 Trust Your Wedding Planner’s Judgment
Although each wedding is different, yours is not the first wedding your planner has planned. Because she or he is a skilled professional, they will be able to determine what will and will not work to make your wedding day run smoothly. Trust their judgment and suggestions. After all, their expertise in executing beautiful events is one of the benefits of hiring a professional wedding planner.

Rule #3 Communicate Your Vision and Make Sure Your Wedding Planner Is On The Same Page, and Does Not Have Their Own Agenda
You have been dreaming of this day forever, so it's important to be able to articulate the vision you have for the most important day of your life. Your planner should not dismiss your wishes or push her own ideas. Of course, there will be times when your planner will make suggestions that based on her experience will help things to run smoother, but those suggestions should be made to make what you have envisioned better, not different.

Rule #4 Be Realistic In Your Expectations
Although your planner is working for you and on your behalf, you are not her only client. Also remember, your planner has a life outside of planning your wedding. Calling her 50 times a day or at unacceptable hours because you can't make up your mind about where to seat your favorite aunt is not a realistic expectation of what the role of a wedding planner is.

Rule #5: Make Sure You Are Ready, Willing, and Able To Relinquish Some of the Control
By this I mean, let your planner do the job you hired her/him to do. So often brides hire a planner and then proceed to do all the work themselves. If you wish to do the planning, my suggestion would be for you to do it, and bring in a Day-Of -Coordinator to carry out the plans you have made for your wedding day.

To avoid a situation where planning your wedding becomes a nightmare and your wedding planner is featured as Freddy (from "Nightmare on Elm Street"), keep these "rules of engagement" in mind when seeking the assistance of a wedding planner to help make your day an Affair To Remember!

Selecting Your Attendants

2008-11-29T21:38:00.004-05:00

A word of caution here, keep in mind that those who stand with you on your wedding day are a representation of you. Please choose your attendants with care. Be cautious about choosing out of obligation or duty. You'll want to select people who love you and have your best interest at heart, and you'll need to have people who are supportive, reliable and willing to lend a helping hand. This sounds like a no brainer, but you'd be surprised at the ugliness that rears its head during the planning: jealousy, sabotage, and the oh so familiar premadona attitudes. Questions to ask yourself when making your choice:
Why am I asking this person to stand up with me at my wedding?
What part of my life has s/he shared?
Will I be happy (or irritated) by this person's presence?

The bottom line is to choose people who you have shared your life with, those who live in your heart and share your dreams for a life of love and happiness.

Post Election Day Tag

2008-11-10T23:13:00.014-05:00

I've been tagged by my colleague Randi Martin at Always Fabulous Events. The topic is Election Day Experience. This was one of those moments you'll never forget where you were when you heard the news. Of course everyone had a different, yet memorable experience this election day, and I am interested to know yours.

Here are the instructions: answer the questions below and tag at least 3 other people and indicate them in your tag. Let's keep it going.

1. Did you vote?
2. In which state are you registered?
3. What time did you go to the polls?
4. How long was your wait?
5. Did you incur any problems?
6. What was your reaction when you heard the news that Barack Obama won?
7. Who was the first person you shared your reaction with?
8. Who will you tag ?

Here are my answers.

1. Absolutely
2. Pennsylvania
3. 6:45 A.M.
4. I don't know what my official number was in line, but I estimated that I was number 150. Once the line started moving it took 35 minutes to get into the booth to cast my vote.
5. Everything went exceptionally smooth. There were no problems. Perhaps everyone was on their P's and Q's because CNN was broadcasting from our polling location.
6. When I heard the news, I sat up in bed, and gave all praise, honor and glory to God.
7. I called my sister who lives in New York. She had turned off the news because she was too nervous to watch, so I was able to break the awesome news to her. I on the other hand had no doubt.
8. I'm going to tag:
Nicole @ Your Champagne Wishes Events, LLC.
Sony @ Bridal Bliss
J. Bride @ The JTA Experience

Oh Happy Day

2008-11-05T22:44:00.022-05:00

Yes we can, and yes we did! A change is here, hope has a new face and the future is now. I am still reeling over the history making victory of Barack Obama being elected as the first black President of the United States of America.
Although we as a people (black people) are experiencing a sense of euphoria over witnessing this historic event, for me, and I think I speak for most in saying that this is absolutely not about skin color, but as Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said in his "I Have A Dream" speech, it's about the content of his character.
Barack Obama ran a pristine campaign. He stayed on target, he did not stoop to name calling and mud slinging, and he spoke to the needs of the American people offering a plan to heal a hurting nation. I believe he will be a great president, and I hope you will join me in praying for him and his family over the next four years (and beyond) as he leads us in the right direction. Praise the Lord, and God Bless America.

FALLing In Love - Inspiration Board #4

2008-10-25T10:55:00.002-04:00

Fall is my favorite season and October is my favorite month. I love the coolness of the breeze in the air and the beauty of the changing colors of the leaves. I also believe that October has become the new June as a very popular wedding month. So in honor of Fall and October, I hope you enjoy this inspiration board which showcases the beauty of Fall, and gives wonderful planning ideas for your fall nuptials. Although I can't take credit for creating this board, which I found on Bridalcanvas.com, I hope to be able to inspire your creative juices to flow as you begin to plan for your wedding.

Make A Note Of This

2008-10-24T15:57:00.000-04:00

Finding useful favor ideas is a job in and of itself. I think this little notebook wedding favor, which I found on the GetMarried.com, is a great idea. They are perfect to keep in the car or your purse or just about anywhere. They can be personalized with your choice of color and "LOVE NOTE" label with your names and wedding date. Each time your guests reach for this practical favor, they'll think of you and the beauty of your special day. Now how cute is that?

Hair Comes The Bride

2008-10-18T21:30:00.000-04:00

Ladies, on an ordinary day our hair is our crown. Let's face it, we just feel better when our hair looks good and is behaving nicely. A bad hair day is definitely not something you want on your wedding day. I found these great bridal hair tips over on USABride.com, and thought I'd post them to help with better planning for your do before you say "I do".

Six months before your wedding, have a major consultation with your stylist. Bring along your headpiece and a picture of the dress if possible. The more the stylist knows about the mood of your wedding, the better he/she can create the perfect hairstyle.
During the "test run," walk around with the hairstyle you plan to wear to determine it's comfort level. A good rule of thumb is: the simpler, the better, since pins can hurt, and intricate styles are often delicate.
Consider the time of day and type of wedding when choosing a style. Loose styles are appropriate for informal or daytime weddings, while up-dos portray a formal, evening look.

Remember that some hairstyles can add inches to a bride's height, and shorter brides may want to use this to their advantage.
Do not have any chemical treatments the day of the wedding. That is not the time for surprises!
Hair color looks its best during the first two weeks. So have hair colored a week or two weeks before the wedding.
If a permanent wave is necessary, have it done a month prior to the wedding. Hair that is too fine and over-conditioned does not style well, so deep conditioning treatments should not be used within four days of the wedding.
For best styling results, shampoo hair lightly the day before the wedding and if possible, do not wash hair the day of the wedding.
Stylist do their best work in their own environment with their own tools, so have your wedding party meet at the salon a couple of hours before they need to be at the ceremony for pictures. This increases efficiency, (and usually cost less!)

It's In The Bag

2008-10-15T22:39:00.002-04:00

I saw this adorable bridal bag at Simply Beautiful Words, and thought is was the cutest thing in the world. What bride wouldn't want to carry such a beautiful bag, which elegantly announces her bridal status?

For that matter, who among us wouldn't want to carry this unique and stylish bag, which gives the world a glimpse into our sense of fashion savvy? Visit the designer Dionne Green at Susej Design, LLC to see these beautiful creations. She only makes 100 of each design in her limited edition. Why not be one of the fashion forward few to own one of these beautiful bags? I sure am.

Pink and Green...Suh-weet - Inspiration Board #3

2008-10-11T17:14:00.003-04:00

Okay, for all the AKA's out there...here's one for you. Enjoy!

Everythings Coming Up Roses - Inspiration Board #2

2008-10-11T01:53:00.008-04:00

Stating the obvious, this inspiration board was inspired by roses - the flower of love. In choosing a theme, the idea is to carry it throughout the components of your wedding. This board shows how using something as simple as roses can create a sense of harmony in your design element. Keep in mind that the idea of a theme is not to go for overkill, but to tell a story in an cohesive and unified manner.

Yay...Tag, I'm It!

2008-10-09T21:17:00.015-04:00

This is too cool. I've been tagged by Katasha of K Sherrie + Company. Okay, I confess. I asked to play and she was kind enough to oblige (thank you). I admit it. I'm big on playing games, so here it goes. I saw this Dot…Dot…Dot list on Affairs With Elegance blog, and thought I'd make it my tag topic.

Here are the rules.
1. Link to the person who tagged you and post the rules on your blog.
2. Copy the following list, clear the information following the dots, and insert your answers to complete the sentence.
3. Tag 4 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs
4. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog

I AM…fearfully and wonderfully made
I WANT…to be one of the featured planners on Whose Wedding Is It Anyway
I HAVE…an addiction to books
I KEEP…a notebook and pen on me at all times to jot down ideas that come to me
I WISH I COULD… plan Oprah's next birthday bash…or better yet…her WEDDING!
I HATE…taking out the trash
I FEAR…the Lord
I HEAR…music in my head
I DON'T THINK…I'll ever get used to text messaging
I REGRET…very little (everything I've experienced…the good, the bad, and the ugly has made me who I am)
I LOVE…my family and friends
I AM NOT…shy
I DANCE…every chance I get
I SING…in the car, in the shower, at work…you name it
I NEVER…let a day go by without telling my mother that I love her
I RARELY…have two bad days in a row
I CRY WHEN I WATCH…"Imitation of Life" (Lakendra, of Affairs With Elegance and I share this one)
I AM NOT ALWAYS…right, and will admit it, when I'm wrong
I HATE THAT…there is so much violence in the world
I'M CONFUSED ABOUT… what people did before cell phones…why is it that in a crowd of 10, every other person is on their cell phone….I don't get it…is anyone talking face-to-face anymore?
I NEED…another vacation
I SHOULD…exercise more

Wow…that was fun. Okay let's see, who should I tag? I think I'll tag the planners of 4 of my favorite blogs…tag, you're IT!

Isis of Destination…Soiree
Randi of Always A Fabulous Event
Aimee of Creative Odd's and End
Tish of The Diva's Thoughts

Fairytales Do Come True

2008-10-06T23:08:00.012-04:00

Wedding Date: October 18, 1992

Their love story began in 1989, when they met. She worked in a downtown law firm. He was a summer associate from Harvard. She was assigned to be his advisor, and as it turned out, he didn’t have much of an interest in corporate law, but he certainly had an interest in something, or should I say someone…and her name was Michelle.

I adore this couple, not just because they will be the first African American President and First Lady of the United States (that’s right, I’m claiming it), but because they are a couple with strong family values, who model what marriage is all about. They are solid in their faith, and they understand the importance of respecting, supporting, and communicating, with each other. Although they have extremely hectic schedules, they know that making time for each other is the number one priority for them and their family. I’ve collected a few quotes from the Obama’s on the subject of marriage and family to bring home this point.

Marriage Obama Style

Barack Obama speaking about time with Michelle
“What I realize as I get older is that Michelle is less concerned about me giving her flowers than she is that I’m doing things that are hard for me – carving out time. That to her is proof, evidence that I’m thinking about her. She appreciates the flowers, but her romance is that I’m actually paying attention to things that she cares about, and time is always an important factor.”
Source: Lynn Norment, Ebony, “The Hottest Couple in America”, February 2007, page 52-54

Michelle Obama speaking about Sundays as family time
“People ask how I’m handling his being away, and I say he’s home more now than when he was running [for office]. He’s breaking his neck to get home on the weekends.”
Source: Ebony, March 2006 v61 i5 p58(4)

Barack about being present with his family
“It’s important that when I’m home to make sure that I’m present, and I still forget stuff. As Michelle likes to say, ‘You are a good man, but you are still a man.’ I leave my socks around. I’ll hang my pants on the door. I leave newspapers laying around. But she lets me know when I’m not acting right. After 14 years, she’s trained me reasonably well.”
Source: Lynn Norment, Ebony, “The Hottest Couple in America”, February 2007, page 52-54

Michelle about fidelity in their marriage
“I never worry about things I can’t affect, and with fidelity…that is between Barack and me, and if somebody can come between us, we didn’t have much to begin with.”
Source: Ebony, March 2006 v61 i5 p58(4)

Barack
“If I ever thought this was ruining my family, I wouldn’t do it.”
Source: Sandra Sobieraj Westfall, “The Obamas Get Personal”, People, August 4, 2008, page 57

Michelle
“Time and love and sacrifice and struggles make you stronger.”
Source: Sandra Sobieraj Westfall, “The Obamas Get Personal”, People, August 4, 2008, page 57

So, as the story continues, after refusing for a month to go out with him, Michelle agreed to dinner and a movie. The movie they saw was “Do The Right Thing”, and you know what, Barack Obama absolutely did the right thing, by marrying a strong, beautiful, articulate, intelligent, supportive, and stylish Michelle Obama, and now just look at him. He’s about to be the next President of the United States, and you know what they say, behind every great man…you go Michelle.

Now this is love and it's a beautiful thing!

The Art Of Asking

2008-10-04T01:04:00.006-04:00

Being asked to be in a wedding is a tremendous honor. I found these adorable cards on Etsy.
What a creative way to ask your attendants to be a part of your big day. These cute little note cards can be customized to coordinate with your wedding colors.
You can present these cards to your wedding party in a formal setting by inviting them to a dinner party, and placing the cards at each place setting. You could also surprise them by sending them in the mail. It sure beats receiving yet another bill, don't you think? The ways in which to ask your wedding party to be a part of your special day are limited only by your imagination. As you'll often hear me say, love is in the details. Why not make your attendants feel extra special by using a little creativity in asking them to stand up with you at your wedding?

What Do You Do When You Can't Go To Egypt?

2008-10-02T17:01:00.014-04:00

Today on Oprah, she interviewed the cast of the new movie "The Secret Life of Bee's".
Queen Latifah, Dakota Fanning, Alicia Keys, Jennifer Hudson and Sophie Okonedo, are all stunningly beautiful, accomplished and successful in their careers. But just like the rest of us, life sometimes gets overwhelming and out of control for them too. Alicia and Queen Latifah both had an opportunity to go to Egypt. For Alicia it was about getting away from the busyness and craziness of her life to be refreshed and renewed. Oprah asked the ladies this question: "What do you do when you can't go to Egypt?" I love this question, because I can certainly relate to needing to be refreshed and renewed from the craziness of my own life. So, what do you do when you need to center yourself and recharge, and can't go to Egypt to do it? Well, we all need to find something to restart our batteries. Here is a small sampling of what I do:

Mornings are my most sacred time. It's the time before the rest of the world starts to vie for my attention. I use this time for daily devotions and prayer.

I'm very careful about letting other people plan my schedule for me. I fiercely guard my time and I am learning to say no to those things which don't line up with the goals I have for my life.

I don't allow other people to "should" on me. You know what I mean, you "should" do this or you "should" do that. I should do exactly the things that I have decided to do, with no input from others who mean well and a few who don't.

When my life gets completely out of control, I turn off all phones for a day. I know when the phone rings, it's someone needing something from me, which is okay most days, but at those times when I am completely spent and overwhelmed, I have to give myself time away from the phone and away from another request for my time and energy.

You get the idea. The lesson here is not just for celebrities, brides or the planners who love them. This lesson is for every human being who has a big life to learn how critical it is to our well being to be able to stop, recharge and reconnect to that which gives us strength and power to do all that we do and maintain our sanity in the process.

Thank You!

2008-09-28T12:56:00.006-04:00

This past May, I planned a 40th birthday party for a dear friend, Vera Cleveland. The theme was White Linen 40th Birthday Celebration. Everyone wore white of course, and the décor was all white with some silver accents. The room was elegant and breathtaking, and the event was a huge smash. Vera and her guests are still talking about it. To me that is a sure sign of a successful event. Vera took the time to send me a beautiful thank you note, which I'd like to share.

Dear Stacey,

I just want to thank you so much for making my 40th birthday a great success. You know in life we have choices. You can choose Tiffany's or Zales, you can choose Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts, Ruth Chris Steak House or Outback, Lexus or Honda, Or you can choose Ordinary or Extraordinary. In my case I choose you, EXTRAORDINARY. You are the best and I would validate that statement at any given time.

You know when we had our initial consultation, I knew what I wanted and you were right there with me. We were on the same page. You saw the BIG picture. You brought out the best ideas. You made my event FABULOUS (like me) the way that I wanted it. The place was beautiful. It was breath taking when you walked in. You greeted the guests with a warm welcome. Even in my moments of panic you took control and made me feel that everything was going to be ok. And really it was.

You just keep doing what you do and God will truly continue to bless you. You have a warm and loving heart and you make things better even when they don’t seem like it.

I enjoyed working with you and I look forward to working with you in the near future.

Love and blessing,

Vera Cleveland

P.S. Start getting ideas ready for my 50th. That is really going to be out of this world. The theme is going to be 50 & Still Fabulous. (LOL) I am looking for the yacht at this present moment.

Thanks

Vera, you are so welcome. I enjoyed working with you, and believe me, I'm looking forward to planning the next event!

Stay tuned for pictures.

Cut Cost Not Quality

2008-09-23T23:35:00.007-04:00

Who doesn't want to have a beautiful wedding? I think it's safe to say that most, if not all couples have this as their ultimate goal. But with a beautiful wedding comes an extravagant price tag, right? Not necessarily. When planning a wedding or any type of event, it's important to remember that it's not all about how much money you have to spend. What makes the difference in having a beautiful wedding and not breaking your pockets to do so, is how you spend the money you have. Following are a few cost cutting ideas to consider when planning that beautiful wedding, without going to the poor house to do it.

Dress For Less
Shop wholesale
Check out E-bay for gowns
Consider renting vs. purchasing
Have gown made
Consider wearing an evening gown vs. a “wedding” gown
Shop for Bridesmaids dress after New Years or during prom season
Shop David’s Bridal $99 sale
Check out Jessica McClintock stores
Purchase a simple plain gown or dress and dress it up yourself with appliqués, trimming etc.
Consider purchasing a sample gown
Check out thrift shops or consignment stores
Borrow a dress
Buy shoes in summer where white shoes are everywhere and avoid purchasing “wedding” shoes
For the groom: Consider wearing a suit vs. tuxedo

Smile Pretty For The Camera
Don’t pinch pennies on photography
Use contracted time for ceremony & reception – forgo the at home pictures. Have friend or family member snap these shots
Have photographer take pictures at ceremony, photo location, and a few detailed reception shots. (Eliminate the need for at home pictures or staying during the entire reception)
Schedule cake cutting, dancing and bouquet and garter toss early and release photographer early
Provide disposable cameras to be used by family and friends to get candid shots at the reception

You're Invited
Print invitations yourself from computer
Consider purchasing standard, plain invitations, and dress them up yourself with photos, ribbon, etc.
Have a local printer or copy center print invitations from a disk provided by you
Use lightweight invitation cards with postcard response cards – to cut down on postage
Mail order or online order invitation vs. going to a printer

Party Time
Cut down the guest list
Serve juice and soda (non-alcoholic beverages) vs. liquor (dress them up to be beachy)
Serve cake and punch vs. a plated meal
Consider hiring student from the restaurant school to cater and serve as wait staff
Purchase your own liquor – wholesale (Make sure facility will allow you to bring in your own liquor) – Also you still need to have a professional bartender
Ask caterer about cheaper alternatives regarding desired menu

They're Playing Our Song
Play taped music vs. having a DJ or Band
Designate a friend or family member to play CD’s

Let Them Eat Cake
Purchase a plain cake and decorate it yourself
Have a sheet cake vs. a tier cake
Get a small decorative cake for pictures and supplement it with a sheet cake
Have a friend or family member who bakes make the cake as a present
Consider having a tower of cupcakes with your initials on them to serve as cake and favors

Tip Toe Through The Tulips
Consider carrying one tropical stem with ribbon vs. bouquets
Let the venue stand on its own – take advantage of the site’s décor
Consider candles or small arrangements vs. elaborate flowers as centerpieces
Consider using local in season flowers
Use lots of greenery and filler and accent with just a few flowers
Opt for a small and simple bouquet
Forgo purchasing a toss bouquet – toss one flower from your bouquet, or toss the whole thing if you are not going to preserve it
Combine fresh flowers with silk flowers
Bride bouquet – fresh flowers, all others silk
Buy in bulk from Cosco’s, Sams, BJ’s
Purchase from a grocery or produce store
Use small Styrofoam balls decorated with flowers or seashells vs. bouquet for bridesmaids

Do Me A Favor
Make donation to a charity in each guest’s name
Favors and trinkets get left behind. Choose something meaningful and something guests will use

Taxi!
Have a family member with an upscale car chauffer you
Rent a car vs. a limo

With This Rings
Purchase from a wholesale jeweler
Consider purchasing rings from the Estate case
Consider catalog shopping

Etc. Etc. Etc.
Purchase your own make-up and have a friend or coordinator do your make-up
Have make-up and hair done by beauty school student
Ask around to see if anyone can donate to your cause – perhaps as a gift – either in service or lending you materials for decorations, etc.
Guest book – use a beautiful journal vs. “wedding” guest book
Utilize Coordinators knife, server, basket, pillow, glasses, etc.
Regarding the above items, do not purchase any “wedding” items – much cheaper to purchase these items not attached to the term ‘wedding” and dress them up yourself

101 Facts About Me

2008-09-21T12:34:00.015-04:00

1. I am a Christian
2. I believe in and love the Lord Jesus Christ
3. My Mother is my best friend
4. I love to read
5. I'm a creature of habit
6. My favorite movie is "Pretty Woman"
7. My favorite colors are yellow and purple
8. I am a middle child
9. I am a hopeless romantic
10. I love all things wedding
11. I was born in 1976…oops I mean 1967 (-:
12. I'm a stickler for being on time
13. My favorite number is 21
14. I'm 5'7" tall
15. I've never broken a bone in my body
16. As long a I can remember, I've wanted to own my own business
17. I love Oprah Winfrey
18. I drive a Honda Civic
19. My pet peeve is people who don't take responsibility for their own actions
20. I will break out in song anytime any place
21. I like to do Sudoku puzzles
22. I've been friends with my best friend Sonya for over 27 years
23. I like country western music
24. I eat chicken everyday
25. I have two sisters: Stephanie and Candie
26. I am a Dallas Cowboy fan
27. Although I live in Philadelphia, I cannot stand the Philadelphia Eagles
28. I like hot cake and cold pie
29. I'm a chocoholic
30. I like dogs (the smaller the better)
31. I don't like cats, I think they're sneaky
32. I took my first cruise this year, and now I'm hooked
33. My anchor bible verse is Romans 8:28 (look it up for yourself)
34. I'm very fickle (it drives my friends and family crazy)
35. My middle name is Mellynn (my mother liked the spelling)
36. My aunt Sweet Pea named me Stacey
37. I can't stand to be hot
38. Even though I need to do more of it, I hate working out
39. I recently lost 30lbs.
40. I'm a music lover
41. I wouldn’t mind going on vacation alone (in fact I think I'll do that next year)
42. I enjoy my own company
43. I like to make people laugh
44. I hate constant complainers (not the people but the act of complaining…it reveals an ungrateful spirit)
45. I get excited about each new bride & groom I plan a wedding for as though they were my first client
46. Although I love shoes, I hate wearing them...in fact they are the first things I kick off when I come through the door
47. I'm an organized person
48. I'm a pack rat (is that an oxymoron?)
49. I'm good at what I do as a wedding/event planner
50. Secretly, I'm very competitive
51. My favorite ice cream is Butter Pecan
52. I go to the 6:30a.m Sunday morning Worship Service
53. When I was 14/15 I packed my bags to run away to marry Erik Estrada
54. My girlfriend Gail who does my hair, named my alter ego Stasha, because that's who emerges when my hair is done
55. My signature scent is Cherry Blossom from Bath & Body Works (thanks Donny for turning me on to it)
56. I've kept a diary since I was 12
57. I will meet Oprah Winfrey before I die
58. I love corny jokes (the cornier the better)
59. I refuse to get a PDA (I'm going to always stick to paper)
60. I have a burden for women and girls with low self-esteem (we are all fearfully and wonderfully made)
61. I am not a morning person
62. My favorite cartoon character is Lucy from Charlie Brown (I just wish she would let poor Charlie Brown kick the football…just once)
63. My favorite wedding planners on Whose Wedding Is It Anyway are Linnyette Richardson-Hall (The WeddingDIVA) and Mary Dann
64. I'm the life of the party…in fact, the party doesn't start until I arrive!
65. I'm deathly afraid of mice, rats, (anything with a tail)
66. I believe in "me time", and I believe you have to take it, because no one is going to give it to you
67. I love to take long drives on beautiful Spring and Fall days
68. I hate text messaging (I can call you and say what I have to say quicker than I can text it)
69. I'm confused about what people did before cell phones. Why is it that in a crowd of 10, every other person is on their cell phone? I don't get it….and it's just plain rude
70. I hate to admit it, but I am an emotional eater...Admitting it is the first step(-:
71. My favorite season of the year is Fall
72. If I should ever get married, I will plan for an October wedding
73. My nick names are: Stacey-Lacey, Stacey-Lacey-McPacy, Miss Stace, Strick, Strickee, Miss Thang, The Queen, Baby O, Face, Stacwa, Stasha, Auntee, Diva, The Brat, Hollywood, Fabulous, Wedding Planner Extraordinaire and recently in Dunkin Donuts, a perfect stranger named me Cherry Blossom…I like that
74. I've been on one blind date (and that's all it took…never again)
75. My most productive day of the week is Friday…I know that's strange
76. My favorite type of movie is a romantic comedy of course
77. I hate making small talk
78. My favorite book is…oh who am I kidding, there are way too many to count
79. I tend to be a workaholic
80. I don't make excuses, I make things happen
81. I equate myself to a swan, because on the surface they are beautiful, calm and graceful, but underneath the water, their little feet are paddling like crazy to get to where they are going. That's how I feel most days
82. I love babies
83. I'm Just A Bill is my favorite School House Rock (but isn't it everybodies?)
84. Did I say I love Oprah (-:
85. My favorite flower is a tulip
86. I enyoy writing
87. My favorite subject in school was art
88. My least favorite subject was and still is math….yuk!
89. Staying in bed all day is one of my guilty pleasures
90. I am an HGTV junkie
91. I cried on my 30th birthday and rejoiced on my 40th (what a difference a decade makes)
92. I absolutely love fish, they calm me
93. I love the water (can't swim a lick, but it calms me too)
94. As I've gotten older, I believe that when it comes to make-up, less is more
95. I've been planning weddings for over 14 years
96. While everyone's eyes are on the bride as she makes her entrance, I always look to see the groom's expression….it's priceless
97. I want to take ballroom dancing lessons
98. I hate drinking out of plastic cups
99. I jump start my morning with a cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee, medium extra, extra
100. Blogging has become my new obsession
101. It's not easy being me….but no one else can do it better (-:

Who Should You Invite?

2008-09-18T23:10:00.001-04:00

In my 14 years of planning weddings, it has been my experience that the number one area of contention between the bride and groom during the planning process is the dreaded guest list (second only to the budget of course)! To help ease the stress of deciding who to invite, and hopefully eliminate those awkward disagreements in front of your wedding planner (wink, wink), following are some tips to consider when developing your guest list:

• Remember, the idea is to surround yourself with the people in your life who are the nearest and dearest to you. Your weddings is no place for mere acquaintances or strangers.

• Keep in mind that the number of guest you invite will affect the cost of your wedding and where you want to hold the ceremony and reception.

Steps To Developing Your List

1. Start with close friends and family and expand from there.
2. Determine if single guests will be allowed to invite an escort to the wedding.
3. Will children be welcomed to attend?
4. Keep in mind your budget, location, and desired ambience.
5. Keep a list of those you would like to invite (B List) but can’t due too constraints such as budget, room size, etc. As people send back their regrets (from A List), mail out additional invitations (from B List). Expect that perhaps 25% of those invited will not be able to attend.
6. Discuss how many names the groom, bride, grooms family, and brides family will be allowed to contribute to the guest list. Try to divide the list evenly between bride and groom. Each parent should be able to invite 1/3 of the guests.
7. Remember, the invitation list should include immediate family, officient, wedding party, and their guests.
8. Think about this: How many of the 300 people you have on your list, have you actually seen or spoken to in the last 5 years? Humm….

Good Night, Sleep Tight

2008-09-17T23:10:00.012-04:00

I have been inspired by one of my favorite blogs, Hostess With The Mostess, and I can't wait to plan my next baby shower using this adorable "Bedtime Story" theme. I'm telling you, this idea is too cute! I wish I could take credit for coming up with this idea. Check out the tables which have been decorated to look like beds. That's simply a genius! The other suggested decorating idea of using framed pictures of sleeping babies brought Anne Geddes to mind. You know she takes the best pictures of all those precious babies posed in cute outfits and different props. Just think of what a wonderful conversation piece this idea would be in addition to serving as a unique decoration element.

Oh, and let's not forget to include your favorite bedtime story. Do you remember what it was? Mine was "The Little Engine That Could". I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...I knew I could, I knew I could, I knew I could...

Oops, sorry I digress, but you get the idea. So much can be done with this idea, and I can't wait to get started.

Love Is In The Details

2008-09-13T13:33:00.010-04:00

Oprah has been quoted as saying "love is in the details", and I certainly agree. Wedding/Event Planning is all about details. Of course there are the details of coordinating logistics, programming, timelines, etc., but there are also the details of incorporating theme and style elements that make you say "why didn't I think of that?" I'm talking about the "WOW Factor", you know, the "little things" that people will be talking about long after the wedding or event is over. This type of detailing requires just a little imagination, a smidge of creativity, and the ability to "think outside of the box". Again, it's all about the little things, for example, consider Personalized Gift Wrap, which I found on NameMaker.com. Imagine walking into a birthday party and finding a very simple centerpiece consisting of varying sized boxes stacked in the center of the table, wrapped in pretty personalized paper with the guest of honor's name on it, and adorned with pretty ribbon and cute embellishments. Something so simple, yet the impact would be memorable.

Or imagine having your gift to the honoree standout from all the rest by wrapping it in Personalized Gift Wrap from you! How cute is that?

The idea here is to make a statement. It doesn't have to be bold and over the top, but it should be creative and well thought out. You know what they say…it's not the gift but the thought that counts!

YIKES!!!!!

2008-09-12T20:57:00.004-04:00

I had a very traumatic experience this week, and this picture from Cats-Mania.com accurately depicts how I felt as a result of it. Wednesday marked my 7th year anniversary at my current place of employment. Every document, every spreadsheet, every report, every-single last thing I've typed and prepared over the last 7 years have been stored on an external drive. So imagine my horror on Monday, when I went to open up this drive to retrieve a document, and it was nowhere to be found! After picking up my heart which had fallen to the floor, I tried all I knew to do to locate/reinstall the drive. After racking my brain, I called our IT person in hopes of solving the problem. Long story short, he did all he knew to do, but after various attempts to retrieve my files nothing worked, and it did not look good when we left the building on Tuesday afternoon. He took the hard drive with him and said he wanted to try one other thing. I must say, I had given up hope, and went home devastated. I was a zombie. That evening, actually, in the wee hours of the morning, after waking up and not being able to go back to sleep because I was worried, I did the last thing I knew to do. I prayed and asked the Lord to help me. When I walked into the office on Wednesday morning, my assistant Deborah informed me that Troy, the IT person, had called to say he had good news. I am absolutely ecstatic to report that God, through Troy and Justin at IBS Communications, restored every-single last file. When I got the news, all I could do was cry, because I knew God heard me and answered my prayer immediately. He was just waiting for me to get to the office to give me the news. Thank you Troy, thank you Justin for all your hard work, persistence and commitment to retrieving and restoring my files. I was and still am elated and eternally grateful.

This also was a trying week for my sister Candie, who turned 39 on Thursday. She too experienced computer problems to devastating proportions. On her birthday, her computer, which she's only had for 6 months, decided to CRASH! Gone, Caput, Bye-Bye…you get the point. Fortunately, there's a happy ending to her story as well. Dell expressed a new hard drive to her, which she was able to get installed quickly, and she is now back up and running. She lost some of her more recent work, but through back and forth email communications, and back up files from her previous computer which crashed 7 months ago, she was not at as much of a loss as I would have been had it not been for a miracle. So the moral of my story….BACK IT UP and PRAY!

Cover Girl - At Last!

2008-09-11T19:48:00.013-04:00

Can you believe it? Finally I'm a cover girl! Before it hits the newsstand, you get the opportunity to see my first magazine cover. LOL...I wish! This is such a cool favor idea. You can create a magazine cover featuring yourself or a loved one for a birthday party, wedding, retirement party, or any event celebrating life. It's perfect and easy to do. Simply go to YourCover.com, upload your picture, select your background color, layout, and insert your desired text, and Bamm...you're a cover girl (or person). Tyra Banks...watch out, here I come!

Whatcha Think?

2008-09-10T22:53:00.005-04:00

Recently, I came across this cool website called PosePrints.com. This site allows you to create personalized stationary by designing a look-a-like image of yourself that can be printed on invitations, notecards, save-the-date announcements, thank you cards, etc. Of course I tried it, and Voila, here I am! So, how did I do? She is cute...just like me don't you think? Smooches!

Get Your Own Pose @ www.PosePrints.com

Yellowicious - What A Bright Idea! - Inspiration Board #1

2008-09-09T21:31:00.005-04:00

This will be the first of many inspiration boards to come. I felt inspired to share my appreciation for the color yellow, not only because it's one of my favorite colors (purple is the other), but because it is such a cheerful color. Although yellow occasionally shows up as an accent color at weddings, or color splash throughout a wedding, these days yellow is not widely used as a predominant color when brides are selecting their color schemes. This is sad because I think yellow is perfect for an outdoor wedding or for a spring time wedding. Yellow just makes you happy, and no better time to communicate to the world your state of happiness than on your wedding day, and no better color than yellow. Give it a try.

The Wedding Day To-Do List Of A Wedding Planner

2008-09-06T15:06:00.011-04:00

A Wedding Planner wears many hats, and I'll speak more about the roles of a wedding planner in a future post. Because I am a list maker (I write lists to direct me to my lists), I thought it would be interesting to create a to-do list for the wedding day, of some of the things a wedding planner actually does, to give a glimpse into all of the wedding day details that are involved in executing the big day. So if you think you don't need a wedding planner, tell me what you think after reading this list. Keep in mind that this list does not take into account any pre-wedding day planning or post wedding day services offered by wedding planners.

1. Make sure bride, groom, parents and entire wedding party are comfortable and have all of the attention and service they need while getting ready for the big day
2. Receive deliveries from vendors
3. Pick up any last minute items
4. Greet vendors and give direction
5. Distribute copies of the complete wedding day itinerary to all vendors
6. Oversee proper set-up and design of ceremony and reception
7. Accept and assist with the distribution and pinning of all corsages, boutonnieres, wedding flowers and flower-girl baskets
8. Ensure proper placement of place cards, wedding favors, ceremony programs, menu cards, disposable cameras, bubbles, unity candle, etc. – according to brides instructions
9. Make sure any guests with special needs have someone to help them without making them feel uncomfortable or like the center of attention
10. Greet guests and direct them to the ceremony
11. Make sure guests sign the guest book (at ceremony & at the reception)
12. Seat bride's family & friends on the left side, groom's family & friends on right side unless otherwise instructed
13. Calm down the flower girl and ring bearer in preparation for their walk down the aisle
14. Line up and cue the wedding party when it's time for them to walk down the aisle and make sure they look great, are smiling, paced perfectly, no hands in pockets, no chewing gum
15. Let the bride know when it’s time to walk down the aisle, make sure she is ready for her big moment. Make sure her dress and train are perfect and send her on her way down the aisle with her escort
16. Make sure all ceremony musicians have the correct musical selections for guest arrival, family seating and also the correct processional and recessional musical selections
17. Come to the rescue of the crying flower girl or ring bearer during the ceremony when Mom and/or Dad happen to be in the ceremony
18. Organize the receiving line and keep it moving
19. Direct guests to the cocktail reception
20. Assist the Photographer in gathering the wedding party and family members for pictures as needed
21. Make sure the bride, groom and entire wedding party get cocktails and hors d'oeuvres during your photography session
22. Make sure the entertainment has proper electricity, shaded seating, staging, etc.
23. Cue entertainment for guest arrival, ceremony and all scheduled special events
24. Make sure all finishing touches are complete and are just as the bride and groom wish before allowing guests to enter reception area
25. Make sure all candles are lit and remain lit throughout the entire reception
26. Answer guests' questions and concerns throughout the day
27. Bustle wedding gown at reception
28. Assist DJ /MC in guiding guests through the day and onto the next scheduled event making sure that no one misses these events
29. Organize the grand entrance and get everyone lined up outside the reception area in correct order
30. Cue the DJ for introductions and grand entrance of wedding party at the reception
31. Always let bride and groom know what's next so they are never caught off guard
32. See to it that parents and very special people are given special care and their every need is catered to
33. Make sure the dietary needs and requests of guests such as allergies, vegetarian and vegan requests are followed through accurately
34. Supervise and communication with the chef and catering staff to ensure superb and timely service
35. Make certain that everyone involved in toasts or special events during the day are cued and ready
36. Take an accurate head count of those at the reception
37. Be sure to have the bride's comfortable shoes ready for her to change into if she desires
38. Make certain that the bride and her shy groom do not get left out in the middle of the dance floor for an entire very long first dance…
39. Or, make sure that the bride and groom are the only two on the dance floor to show off those moves they learned in those dance lessons they took over the past year
40. Make sure the grandmothers of the couple get a great spot for the cake cutting and first dance, etc.
41. Come to the rescue with a damp cloth when the groom isn't as nice as he promised to be during the cake cutting
42. Be there by the couple's side, ready and available for any emergencies or unexpected occurrence
43. Guide them graciously through their day, keep things running on schedule
44. Distribute final balances and gratuities to vendors on behalf of the couple
45. Keep track of, organize and pack everything up for couple, at the end of the evening
46. Make sure centerpieces are given away according to couple's instructions
47. Collect disposable cameras, gifts, guest book, pen, toasting glasses, cake top, etc., and take everything to the couples honeymoon suite, designated room or designated car
48. Arrange getaway transportation, make sure it is present and on time
49. Know exactly when the bride needs a soft voice to calm her (one other than her family or close friends)
50. Be the one person to give her a little laughter when those people nearest and dearest to her are driving her nuts
51. Box or bag up additional wedding cake
52. Facilitate the send off of the bride and groom
53. Make sure the bride and groom receive a food basket from caterer to take to the hotel or honeymoon suite
54. Take care of all of the above details so the bride and groom won't have to
55. Make sure the couple has an Affair To Remember! (I threw this one in for good measure)….Smooches!

So, how's that for a to-do list?

Breathtaking

2008-09-04T22:37:00.006-04:00

Beautiful centerpieces that make a statement but don't overwhelm the table are hard to come by. While browsing various websites for centerpiece inspiration, I came across James Abel Events and found this beautiful masterpiece. I just think it is breathtaking. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

What's Your Bridal Style?

2008-09-03T20:22:00.012-04:00

During my first meeting with a bride who has signed on as a client, one of the many questions I ask her is to give me 3 adjectives to describe her dream wedding. Some of the responses I have gotten are: romantic, elegant, sophisticated, fun, festive…you get the idea.

The reason for asking this question is to get a feel for her bridal style, to be able to pull together the style elements for her wedding. Each bride has her own bridal style, but getting her to articulate what it is in a way that can be translated into her dream wedding, is not always an easy job. What I have found to be helpful in gathering this information is to provide her with the following style categories and associated descriptive words, which paint a picture that really gives a feel for her sense of style and the direction in which to proceed in planning her wedding. The following list is highlighted in the book "Whats Your Bridal Style? by authors Sharon Naylor and Casey Cooper.

Adventurous Bridal Style
Thrilling, Risky, Daring, Gutsy, Bold, Unabashed

Classic Bridal Style
Timeless, Definitive, Quintessential, Legendary

Contemporary Bridal Style
Trendy, Cutting Edge, Modern, In Vogue, Current

Elegant Bridal Style
Graceful, Classical Music, Chic, Classy

Fairy Tale Bridal Style
Enchanted, Magical, Imaginative, Princess Gown

Glamorous or Glam Bridal Style
Gorgeous, Sexy, Alluring, Feather Boa, Glittery, Extravagant

Romantic Bridal Style
Candlelight, Champagne, Violins, Lyrical, Fairy tale

Understated Bridal Style
Simple, Modest, Unpretentious, Low-key, Quiet

Another cool tool that I recently came across can be found at Kate Aspen's Website. You can take the Unveil Your Bridal Style Quiz and be directed from there to some really cute favors that match your style. I took the quiz and unveiled that I am an Elizabeth, which falls right in line with the above Classic Bridal Category.

Omazing

2008-09-01T18:44:00.019-04:00

Oh my God! I'm so excited. Thanks to one of my dear friends (Louella Gray), I got the opportunity to see Oprah Winfrey live and in person. Oprah was the keynote speaker at the 20th Annual Whitesboro Reunion Festival on Saturday, August 30, 2008. Stedman Graham, Oprah's longtime beau, is a native of the small town, and on this day the town officially named August 30th as Stedman Graham Day.

In true Oprah fashion, she was soooo inspiring. She encouraged us to "vote" for ourselves, and exhorted us to dream about the impossible, to execute the impossible and recognize that with God all things are possible. She shared her daily morning prayer "to be used in service for that which is greater than herself". She made it clear that the key to her success has been hard work and keeping her hands stedfast in God's hand. She painted a very clear picture of her surrendering her desire to be apart of the Color Purple, and rejoicing when God moved after her surrender. In the words of Obama…."I get it".

On top of all this she donated $220,000 as the first installment of her $1 million dollar donation to the Concerned Citizens of Whitesboro scholarship fund. That was awesome. I'm not even from the town, and I was one of the first to get on my feet in applause to her generosity.

I have to tell you, this was a surreal experience for me, one I won't soon forget. Thank you Louella…Love Ya Girl!

Congratulations You're Engaged, Now What?

2008-08-28T18:48:00.005-04:00

Soooo glad you asked.

Knowing what to do next can mean the difference between your dream or drama. A very crucial first step in planning your wedding, after setting the date, is to hire a professional wedding planner.

Many times this step is overlooked or thought of at a point where you have become so overwhelmed that planning your wedding is no longer fun, but frustrating. And still for many, hiring a wedding planner is not even on their "wedding planning radar"...this can be a costly mistake!

Hiring a wedding planner is not a luxury, it is an absolute necessity.

A good piece of advice I always offer my couples is to enjoy the process, and have fun with the planning. The way this can be achieved is by allowing a professional wedding planner to handle the details.

Although this is an exciting time for you and your loved ones, it can also be a highly stressful time with all the details, scheduling, decisions to be made, etc., but it doesn’t have to be.

The average wedding cost is $28,000 and involves over 700 hours of planning time. With this investment of time and money, why would you trust the most intricate details of your wedding to Aunt Susie, who thinks it would be "fun" to "try" her hand at planning it? Nothing against Aunt Susie, but she has been known to get bored easily, and what's to say that something else won't distract her during the planning process...I'm just sayin'....

So...why should you hire a Wedding Planner? So glad you asked.

A planner knows exactly where to start.

Planning a wedding or any event is a process. The anxiety of not knowing what to do next can be stressful and costly. Because a planner has done many events s/he knows exactly where and how to begin, and at what pace to proceed. S/he knows the exact questions to ask a vendor, what loopholes to look for in a contract, how to direct all those involved in the wedding. S/he can negotiate prices and services so that you get more bang for your buck, and in some cases, pay less buck for the bang. S/he knows how to communicate with vendors to ensure quality service. Communication is the name of the game in planning any type of event. It is imperative that everyone is on the same page. Asking questions is a must, and knowing the right kinds of questions to ask comes with experience and the skill of knowing how to get and give clarity to all who are involved in your big day.

A planner knows how to cut costs without cutting quality.

S/he sees the big picture and can protect your day from being a disaster because s/he knows that if you stay in a hotel located clear across town you could run the risk of delaying the start time of your wedding by an hour and a half. This is an exaggerated example of course, but being on time is critical for many reasons: food quality, ability of vendors to deliver contracted services, avoidance of over time charges, etc.

A planner serves as a buffer.

S/he acts as a go-between when it comes to handling those sticky situations between you and your family. S/he protects you, on the big day, from having to deal with problems that will inevitably pop up.

A planner provides an objective shoulder to cry on.

No one else in this industry can boast this claim. Your wedding planner is with you longer than any other vendor. S/he takes on the role of acting as your best friend and confidant. S/he listens to you vent about the ugly table linens your mother-in-law to be insists that you order for the reception. S/he smoothes things over when you and your fiance' have a spat about where to seat his favorite cousin, who has a tendency to have uncontrollable outbursts. S/he's the first one you call when you can't make up your mind about pink or blush nail polish, and through it all, s/he smiles, calms your spirits, and guarantees that everything will be alright--and of course, at the end of the day...s/he's absolutely right!

S/he is seen as, and is respected in the industry as the go to person, the one who will pull all of the pieces together

S/he will see to it that all those you hired to provide a service will do so to your specifications and bring your dream to fruition.

S/he is skilled in keeping things on track so that the celebration you have planned is not ruined because of a schedule that has been delayed or altered. S/he'll work it out and you'll never realize that s/he pushed back the time to cut the cake so your photographer could have 30 more minutes to get the must have photos of your family and friends.

The bottom line is that you can't afford not to hire a wedding planner because it's her/his job, and absolute pleasure to work on your behalf to pull all of the intricate details together to produce an Affair To Remember.